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i’m learning a lot about faith.
i’m learning a lot about hope.
i’m learning a lot about grace.

being sick and putting life on hold for two entire months is a very tough thing to do…especially for someone like me, who loves having lots of things happening at once, loves seeing as many people as possible, and loves living in general.  it can tear away at a person big time.  it’s torn away at me..  but i’ve seen how feeble i can make my faith sometimes.  i know that God will lead me through this, but satan tries to take away hope.  he wants to seek, kill, and destroy.  but i’ve realized what a difference faith makes in every situation, knowing and believing that God is active in my life, even though my “life” seems to be so inactive. 

and i could be so much worse.  grace has been given when needed most.  God has worked everything out that i’ve needed.  i’ve learned so much through these times.  i’ve kind of realized who will be there once i’ve gone away.  i’ve also noticed how little time i give God during my day, even though so many times i blamed it on the fact i was busy, and still felt like i was giving a big enough chunk of time.  now that i do nothing, it’s just as little, and i have nothing to blame it on.  i’m learning what i can handle.  i’m grasping the fact that this is all temporary.  i’m gonna be okay, and i’ll be my normal, active self soon enough.

i’d like to hear from people.  call me. visit me. IM me. send me things.  let me know you’re alive.  and most of all, prayer is the best possible thing.  you can help speed up my recovery by just making me happy.  i love and miss you all.


You stand on mountain tops with me.
with You i walk through the valleys.
You gave Your only Son for me.
Your grace is all I rely on.


8 thoughts on “

  1. Aww, well I hope I’ve been helping you out some. I always try to let you know that I’m prayin for ya, and I don’t mind listening to you complain, since you’ll always listen to me….
    I really hope that we can hang out sometime…I think you’d be a pretty awesome friend to get to know a lil’ more…I dunno, just a thought…
    Feel better soon! I’m prayin’ like crazy for ya…


  2. Yeah, going to alive as a youth pastor kinda…it’s so cool, something i’ve always wanted. It’s cooler than school. For real. And now i’m in “In the Red” with andrew and our drummer is cool and my life isn’t just work and school and it’s so great. I feel so good focusing on something other than me. And I’m more focus on God now than I have been in a long while. I was in such a spiritual lull, I feel so alive right now. ah. all that just kind of came out, but you’ve always been good at listening so I don’t think you’ll mind.So…how’s things with you?


  3. i learn so much from just one xanga post from you
    if nothing else, count that as something positive about your sickness. you’ve used it for such a ministry.
    that’s inspiring


  4. can i teach you one more thing about faith, bud?
    glorify God instead of your sickness.
    what i mean is, use your faith by speaking about God’s goodness and healing instead of talking about being sick. i dont see in the bible where we’re to use our sickness as a ministry tool, but i do see where Jesus used healing as one…and where he took our sickness on the cross, so we wouldnt have to.
    i love you brandon and i want to see your face sometime soon.


  5. the song is “let go” by frou frou. its from the garden state soundtrack which rocks like woah! i miss you too brandon and soon we will hug and frolick around in the grass by the pond and shop till our heads shop at the village.


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