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unseen clarity
and fading symphonies
growing tunnels, standing still

unsung melodies
and endless questioning
barren season, holding on

but You are faithful. You are glory.
You are seeing me through.

so be made perfect
in this weakness.
beautifully cover me 
while You become revealed.


edit: tonight i had an mri.  first of all, thanks for any prayers.  they were felt big time. 

it was probably the scariest thing i’ve ever had to do.  (i know i could have been way worse off, and if anyone reading this feels like i’m complaining about nothing or trying to sound like i have it so bad, please don’t get the wrong idea.  i’m just writing about my experience.) first i had to sign these papers..(i was finally about to calm down) and when i received the last one, this lady said “and this is for your injection.”  if any of you know me, you know that shots are one of my biggest fears in life.  i went to the bathroom first and almost passed out.  with the mri fear and that added to it, i was pretty much petrified.  yes, i’m a wuss.  you don’t have to tell me.  then the big alien-type mri machine.  i went in it and prayed and sang “here i am to worship” really slowly over and over again.  i was so shaky that i was like constantly shivering. at one point i fell asleep, then woke up, realized where i was and kind of freaked out (my head was taped down and it was like i was abducted by aliens. haha) they had to redo a test because of it. but God is good.  i prayed for my friends doing missions across the world (sarah, sarah, mikkele, kathryn)..  halfway through, they took me out.  i got the shot.  right in the vein.  AGHHH the last time i got a shot, i fainted.  and that wasn’t even in the vein (thoughts of veins make me sick).  but i pretended i got stung by a bee.  then i pretended oscar bit me.  then i went back in. i asked God to take me somewhere mentally..  almost immediately i was where i was last wednesday during chris tomlin’s concert.  i was getting dizzy in the crowd so i went up to the back of the hill on the side where it was open and there was a breeze and i worshipped alone.  and by the end of the test, i was laying in a tube smiling and singing (silently) to Jesus.  and it was over.  and then i couldn’t walk straight.  and my arm was tingly.  and then i ate french fries.  and i have dye in my head.

praise Jesus.

ps: another way God helped ease the pressure is that one of my good friends through middle and high school (tyler diana) helped do the mri.  i haven’t seen him since graduation.


14 thoughts on “

  1. man…I love you dude. Having one of those things done is something that I’ve always had fears about (I’ve never had one done, but I’ve thought about them) and it’s amazing just how God worked in a situation like that to bring you peace and comfort. I mean…when I read stuff like what you just wrote…I wonder about how different it would be if you didn’t know God. Like…it blows my mind how non-Christians walk this Earth without going totally insane. If I wasn’t saved…I don’t know where I’d be today.


  2. Glad to hear things with your mri went pretty well. God is amazing!!! So glad He really pulled you through this one. You’ve been in my thoughts and prayers a lot lately and I just really hope He continues to heal you and bring you back to good health.


  3. *random props!*
    dude, your xanga is amazing. btw, i’m melita, and i found your page via DCB blogring. i liked this entry very much. God is faithful. and the pics in your previous entry are beautiful! anywho, keep fighting the good fight. i might keep up with your xanga cuz it’s cool 🙂 take care.


  4. i will say it again.
    if your xanga were a person, i would marry it. then take it to fiji. with my rich father in-law’s money. (right)?
    [i just added that part. like it?]


  5. I understand the whole MRI fear… I had one too and it’s no day at the parade… no siree… You were definately very blessed that day though, very unexpectedly, the way God likes it.
    You’re in my prayers.


  6. I saw you at Alive twoo!!!
    Anyways. I’ve never seen your toes before, Brandon. Until tonight that is.
    I’m glad everything went well. There are those little random comforts that God passes on to us just to help us along (refering to someone you knowing helping out with the MRI and whatnot).
    Any baby news yet?
    hahaha that sounds bad.


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